THE HBWHOF #1 HORROR FLICK HOT CHICK!!!!

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!!!!
I'M READY TO GO TRICK OR TREATING...SO, HERE'S THE FINAL INSTALLMENT OF HOT HORROR FLICK CHICKS....
TONIGHT'S VERY SPECIAL HALLOWEEN HOTTIE...JENNIFER LOVE HEWITT...

Ms. Hewitt was frightened in...I Know What You did Last Summer, I Still Know What You Did Last Summer and NOW she is the Ghost Whisperer!!!
But...the main reason that she is the HBWHOF HOT HORROR FLICK CHICK HALLOWEEN HOTTIE is because she possesses ONE OF THE SWEETEST RACKS ON EARTH!!!!!








HMMM....NICE RACKAGE...AND A CELTICS' FAN....NICE!!!














REMEMBER THAT JOHN MAYER SONG, "YOUR BODY IS A WONDERLAND?"
WELL, MAYER USED TO DATE JENNIFER LOVE HEWITT...AND HE WROTE THAT TUNE ABOUT HER!!

CONGRATS PHILLIES...SARAH MICHELLE GELLAR...

THE PHILADELPHIA PHILLIES ARE THE 2008 WORLD SERIES CHAMPIONS!!!
THE PHILLIES BEAT TAMPA BAY 4-3...

COLE HAMELS, WHO HAD JUST WON THE NLCS MVP, TOOK HOME THE WORLD SERIES MVP TOO...
ALONG WITH A BRAND-SPANKING-NEW CAMARO THAT HE'S GIVING TO HIS HOT WIFE WHO CELEBRATED HER 30TH BIRTHDAY THE VERY SAME NIGHT!!!!



INSTALLMENT #4 OF HOT HORROR FLICK CHICKS...
TODAY...SARAH MICHELLE GELLAR...



THIS SMOKIN' HOT CHICK OWNS THE HORROR GENRE!!
MS. GELLAR HAS APPEARED IN...I KNOW WHAT YOU DID LAST SUMMER, SCREAM 2, SCOOBY DOO, SCOOBY DOO 2: MONSTERS UNLEASHED(DUDES, YOU KNOW SHE'S HOT IF SHE'S DAPHNE BLAKE...), THE GRUDGE, THE GRUDGE 2 AND, THIS BABE WAS THE SLAYER...AS IN BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER!!!!!!!!

















HMMM....THE NAUGHTY NURSE...IT NEVER GETS OLD....

ROSE McGOWAN & HALLOWEEN CHEERLEADERS!!!

OK kiddies....8:37 PM...bottom of the 6th inning....tied 2-2...PLAY BALLLLL!!!

Installment #3 of HOT HORROR FLICK CHICKS...
TODAY...ROSE McGOWAN...

Ms. McGowan has appeared in such sweet horror films as SCREAM, PHANTOMS, PLANET TERROR, GRINDHOUSE and she was one of the HOT WITCH SISTERS on CHARMED!!
In PLANET TERROR she played Cherry Darling and strutted around on a machine-gun prosthesis with which she blew-away the zombies who ate her real leg!!!!













DO NOT MESS WITH ROSE McGOWAN....



THE HBWHOF REALLY DIGS OCTOBER!
THERE ARE SO MANY COOL THINGS TO LOOK FORWARD TO WHEN OCTOBER ROLLS AROUND...
CANADIAN THANKSGIVING, NHL HOCKEY, OCTOBERFEST, BASEBALL PLAYOFFS, THE WORLD SERIES, SCARY MOVIES, HOT CHICKS DRESSED ALL SLUTTY AND NFL CHEERLEADERS IN HALLOWEEN COSTUMES....

TAKE A CLOSE LOOK AT THIS ORDINARY, EVERYDAY CHEERLEADER...





NOW...TAKE A LOOK AT THESE CHEERLEADERS DRESSED-UP FOR HALLOWEEN...

THE SCHOOLGIRL...


THE INDIAN MAIDEN...


THE COWGIRL...


THE FOOTBALL PLAYER (Notice the cork under the eyes...)


THE GIRL SCOUT...


HALLOWEEN AND HOT CHICKS JUST GO TOGETHER...THE PERSONAL FAVOURITE OF THE HBWHOF IS THE NAUGHTY NURSE(modelled here by Denise Milani)...

SUSPENDED GAME...MONIQUE ST. PIERRE...

Geez...did you see that MESS last night?
The Phillies and Rays played the first suspended game in World Series history!!
The lovely weather in Philadelphia has now forced the final 3 innings of Game 5 to be resumed - tentatively - on Wednesday at 8:37 PM.

WE DON'T HAVE RAINOUTS AT THE HOT BASEBALL WIFE HALL OF FAME....
The HBWHOF is continuing our countdown to HALLOWEEN with HOT HORROR FLICK CHICKS...
Today....MONIQUE ST. PIERRE......


Yep..I know...there's a handful of Hot Chicks that have appeared in Horror/Monster/Slasher movies that are more well-known...but there is a method to this madness!
I started us off with the Hot Chick from my favourite Horror movie...John Carpenter's 1978 Classic - HALLOWEEN....featuring the soon-to-be-HOT-RACKAGE of Jamie Lee Curtis!!
Today, I'm fast-forwarding two years to the obscure but CLASSIC film -
MOTEL HELL (1980)!!!
This is just a GREAT flick...Farmer Vincent kidnaps unsuspecting travellers...buries them neck-deep in his garden...slits their vocal cords so they can't scream...feeds 'em to plump 'em up...yanks 'em back out with his tractor...and carves 'em up to use for filling for his yummy smoked-meat snacks!!



Monique St. Pierre was Playboy's Playmate of the Month for November 1978 and became the 1979 Playmate of the Year!!! She co-starred in MOTEL HELL!!

GO PHILLIES...SCREAM QUEEN #1...

Well kids, the HBWHOF has been calling-out Ryan Howard...and the big-guy answered back...Howard slammed two taters...a three-run shot in the 4th inning and a two-run blast in the eighth!! Even Joe Blanton got in on the action - becoming the first pitcher to hit a World Series' homer since 1974.
Oh yeah, the Phillies won...10-2!!!!
Cole Hamels has a shot a becoming the first playoff pitcher to win all five of his starts!!
Tonight...8:00 PM....Scott Kazmir vs. Cole Hamels...with the World Series title on the line....



LET'S CELEBRATE THE PHILLIES....




GOSH....THE HBWHOF REALLY DIGS BODYPAINTING....




HERE'S THE HBWHOF COUNTDOWN TO HALLOWEEN WITH HOT HORROR FLICK CHICKS.....
TODAY.....JAMIE LEE CURTIS
(Horror resume...The Fog, Prom Night, Terror Train and, of course, the legendary Halloween, Halloween II, Halloween III: Season of the Witch, Halloween H2O: 20 Years Later and Halloween: Resurrection...)

SARAH PALIN & ELISHA CUTHBERT.....

Phillies take Game 3 on the first walk-off infield hit in World Series history!
Philadelphia beat Tampa Bay 5-4 when Carlos Ruiz hit an infield chopper
(more like a swinging bunt...) down the third-base line to bring in the winning run.
Rays' manager Joe Maddon employed a five-man infield - with two outfielders playing shallow - to try and thwart the winning score!

NICELY DONE!!...BEAT THAT STUPID TEAM WITH COWBELLS AND BOY CHEERLEADERS....

OK...I haven't been caught-up in all the Sarah Palin fervor...I'm an Obama-kinda-guy..
But remember, not long ago, Sarah Palin dropped the ceremonial faceoff at a Philadelphia Flyers vs. New York Rangers game...




...well, I open up the newspaper on Saturday morning and see this pic on the front of the Sports section....


Sarah was dropping the puck at Friday's St. Louis Blues vs. Los Angeles Kings game!
I really have to admit...SARAH PALIN IS A HOT CHICK!!!!!
Dudes...this babe is 44 YEARS OLD!!...she's given birth to 5 kids!!!...she's a former sports reporter...and she can slice n' dice a moose in minutes!!!!
Although I don't agree with her politics...she's a LOOKER!!




Since the NHL season is in full swing let's take a look at a HOT HOCKEY GIRLFRIEND...
.... Calgary Flames' defenceman Dion Phaneuf has been dating Elisha Cuthbert...












...NICELY DONE, MR. PHANEUF....

MMM...MARISA MILLER!!!!!

Tonight.....Jamie Moyer vs. Matt Garza...GAME 3....
THANK GOD NO MORE FREAKIN'....


Here at the HBWHOF we're HUGE fans of Marisa Miller...and anytime we can find an excuse to feature Marisa Miller pictures we'll GET 'ER DONE!!!
Here's Marisa's new photo shoot for Complex Magazine...















...HERE'S MARISA PLAYING A LITTLE BALL....

....OLD - TIME HOCKEY, BABY!!!!

Well, the Phillies lost Game 2...4-2...with the help of two horrible calls by home-plate umpire Kerwin Danley...but they still NEED TO START HITTING WITH DUCKS ON THE POND!!!!

....HOWARD...START CONNECTING!!!



Here's an update from THE BIG HIT in the Boston - Toronto game last night...
( pics courtesy of The Boston Herald)


Here's the two fans that were directly behind the glass...



....ONE MORE TIME.....


.....YESSS!!!.....OLD-TIME HOCKEY.....

HERE'S THE HIT....

Yep,up on YouTube already...
Here's the TSN feed....



Here's the NESN feed...

HUGE HIT TONIGHT IN BOSTON!!!

OK.....I'm watching the Toronto Maple Leafs play in Boston RIGHT NOW...
....and one of the BRUINS just SMOKED one of the LEAFS and the
GLASS JUST EXPLODED!!!
I'm sure it'll be up on YouTube soon...
Until then this will have to suffice....

THE HBWHOF DOES A 360!!!

Tonight...Game 2...Brett Myers vs. James Shields...
The Phillies take Game 1...3-2...but the scary thing is they went 0-for-13 with runners in scoring position and stranded 11 men....and Ryan Howard is looking WEAK....the Rays better hope that dude's bat doesn't wake-up...
...GEEZ, LOUISE....Cole Hamels can pitch!!!




I know by posting this...I'm one step closer to the Gates of Hell...but...



Since this is the Hot Baseball Wife Hall of Fame...let's concentrate on World Series' Eye Candy...The Rays and the Phillies both have their own respective versions of "cheerleaders." Let's begin with Tampa Bay...their team is freakin' CO-ED...

...SAY HI! TO MATT & T.J.!!!




HOLY LIBERACE!!!....GEEZ, TAMPA BAY TAKE A CUE FROM THE FLORIDA MARLINS....




....I GUESS ONE TEAM IN THE SUNSHINE STATE GOT IT RIGHT!!!!

Now, let's get to the Phillies.
The Phillies "Ballgirls" actually perform the duty of ballgirls - they sit along the foul line and snag balls that go out of play. They also field a softball team that plays in charity events. So, they're comprised of HOT, ATHLETIC CHICKS! Kudos to you PHILADELPHIA!!!










I AM NOW RESCINDING MY SUPPORT FOT THE AMERICAN LEAGUE CHAMPIONS... I TRIED TO OVERCOME MY INITIAL DISGUST WITH THE RAYS FOR OUSTING MY BELOVED RED SOX...
BUT NOW...NOW THAT I'VE DISCOVERED THAT THEY HAVE MALE CHEERLEADERS...
I'M GIVING THE OFFICIAL HBWHOF ENDORSEMENT TO THE PHILADELPHIA PHILLIES!!!!!



SORRY....I NEED TO TAKE ANOTHER LOOK AT STEPHANIE....

GAME ONE.....

WORLD SERIES...GAME ONE...COLE HAMELS(14-10) vs. SCOTT KAZMIR(12-8)
Two of the best pitchers in baseball...both lefthanders...both 1st round picks from the draft class of 2002...
This provides me with an excuse to induct another HOT CHICK into the Hot Baseball Wife Hall of Fame!!!
You see, Cole Hamels just happens to be married to a HOT CHICK who was a former contestant on Survivor: The Amazon.
Cole Hamels married Heidi Strobel on December 31, 2006.
Mrs. Hamels was a contestant on season six of Survivor. During one of the endurance challenges Heidi and fellow contestant Jenna Morasca stripped off their clothing in exchange for peanut butter and Oreo cookies(I LOVE CHICKS LIKE THIS...).
Heidi and Jenna ended up posing in the August 2003 edition of Playboy!
Ladies and Gentlemen, I invite you to check out Heidi Strobel...the newest inductee into the HBWHOF....













...ENJOY THE GAME.....

THE RAYS & JETER'S LADIES....

Once again...Congratulations to the Tampa Bay Rays...
I'm rooting for these guys to win the World Series. The HBWHOF favours the American League. That's just how we roll.....

If this dude stays healthy...he'll be a FORCE TO BE RECKONED WITH...
David Price struck out J.D.Drew with the bases loaded to end the eighth inning.
Price finished Drew off with a 97 mph fastball!!!!



Now that the Red Sox are OUT...we can get back to what ELVIS used to call "TCB"
...TAKIN' CARE OF BUSINESS....let's concentrate on the HOT CHICK SCENE...
Since I'm a member of RED SOX NATION I possess an innate distaste for the New York Yankees. However, I greatly admire the Hugh Hefner of baseball...Derek Jeter!!
Jeter is the KING OF SHAGGING HOT CHICKS....let's take a roll-call of his conquests, shall we...

MARIAH CAREY



LARA DUTTA


JORDANA BREWSTER



SCARLETT JOHANSSON



GABRIELLE UNION



JESSICA ALBA



ADRIANA LIMA



VANESSA MINNILLO



JESSICA BIEL



Jeter's current squeeze is MINKA KELLY!
Rumours have been circulating for quite some time now that the Yankees' captain was dating the Friday Night Lights' actress...but those rumours were confirmed this past weekend when Jeter and Kelly attended the Texas - Missouri football game....





Jeter even managed to squeeze-in a few pics with the Longhorn Cheerleaders...




MORE MINKA...






JETER'S LIKE AN INSTITUTION...HE COULD KEEP THE HBWHOF IN BUSINESS ALL BY HIMSELF!!!

A LONG WINTER IS UPON US...

THE TAMPA BAY RAYS CAPTURED THEIR FIRST AMERICAN LEAGUE PENNANT!!
THEY BEAT THE RED SOX 3-1...AND I WON'T BE SEEING TOO MUCH OF OUR LADY OF SUPREME HOTNESS UNTIL SPRING.....



SO...CONGRATULATIONS TAMPA BAY...ENJOY THE WORLD SERIES...
P.S.- I WAS REALLY IMPRESSED BY DAVID PRICE...THAT KID CAN HURL!!!!

IN HONOUR OF THE RAYS VICTORY...HERE'S JENN STERGER...A BIG-TIME FLORIDA GAL...
(Yeah, yeah...I know...she's working for the New York Jets now....)

TONIGHT'S THE NIGHT....

THINGS ARE LOOKIN' GOOD....RED SOX WIN 4-2...VARITEK GOES YARD!!!



TONIGHT...THE HBWHOF'S FAVOURITE PITCHER TAKES THE MOUND...
JON LESTER (16-6) VS. MATT GARZA (11-9)

JESSICA BURCIAGA WANTS TO SEE THE RAYS GET SPANKED....

THE RACK PACK......PART IV

Let's recap the Hot Baseball Wife Hall of Fame's version of "The Rat Pack"...
Thus far we have:
Frank Sinatra - Salma Hayek
Dean Martin - Denise Milani
Sammy Davis, Jr. - Angel Malaku (aka - Lola Luv)
Member #4...the HBWHOF stand-in for Peter Lawford is...LUCY PINDER!!!
Peter Lawford was born in England...so the HBWHOF searched across the pond to find Ms. Pinder who possesses impressive RACKAGE that has been voted "the most
all-natural pair in Britain!"
I invite the readers of the HBWHOF to join me in a stroll down MAMMARY LANE...






...notice a pattern here...the English photographers can't get enough of the
"HAND-BRA" pose.....








Let's try a few booty shots...





.....BACK TO RACK.....








.....THIS IS AN UNDERSTATEMENT.......

THE MOTHER OF ALL COMEBACKS!!!!

WHOA!!!!
WHERE DO I BEGIN.....
NO TEAM...READ THIS ALOUD, KIDS...NO FREAKIN' TEAM FACING POSTSEASON ELIMINATION HAS EVER COME BACK FROM SEVEN RUNS DOWN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Way, way back in October 1929 the Philadelphia Athletics overcame an eight-run deficit to defeat the Chicago Cubs(...who else?), 10-8, in Game 4 of the World Series. But....the Cubs weren't facing elimination.....
DOWN 7-0 IN THE BOTTOM OF THE 7TH INNING WITH TWO OUTS AND THE RED SOX COME BACK TO WIN 8-7!!!!!!
BABY, IT DOESN'T GET MUCH SWEETER THAN THAT......



Oh Danny boy, the pipes, the pipes are calling
From glen to glen, and down the mountain side
The summer's gone, and all the flowers are dying...



Jessica Burciaga will NOW show you a little skin.....

IT'S DO OR DIE...

C'MON BOYS...DON'T LET ME DOWN....
I'M NOT READY TO LET GO OF OUR LADY OF SUPREME HOTNESS YET.....WINTER IS TOO LONG ALREADY....


MS. BURCIAGA IS TIRED OF FEELING SO CONFINED IN ALL THAT CLOTHING.....

REMEMBERING GOOD TIMES IN BOSTON...

OK...the Red Sox have time to contemplate possible elimination all day today...
next game - Thursday, October 16th...8:07 PM...Scott Kazmir(12-8) vs. Dice K Matsuzaka(18-3)...C'MON BOYS YOU CAN DO THIS...AGAIN!!!!

Since we have a one-day hiatus from baseball let's talk about...HOCKEY!
When I was just a little Looper the walls of my bedroom were adorned with pictures of my sports' heroes. This was WAY BACK in the early 1970's...before I became obsessed with HOT CHICKS...gosh, it seems so very long ago....
Anyway, I can still picture my boyhood sanctuary - I had posters of the 1972 version of Team Canada that defeated the Russians in the "Summit Series!"


I had a poster of Chicago Bears' HOF middle linebacker - Dick Butkus. Another poster commemorating Al Kaline's 3,000th hit. Naturally, I had posters of Red Sox legends Carl Yastrzemski and Carlton Fisk! But...even though I grew up a Toronto Maple Leafs' fan (yep...HOW SAD IS THAT?...my impressionable young mind was obviously brainwashed by Hockey Night in Canada!!)...I had posters of two hockey superstars on my wall... Gordie Howe of the Detroit Red Wings and....Bobby Orr!!!
Man, I was a HUGE fan of Bobby Orr. I had the #4 Boston Bruins' jersey. I only used Victoriaville hockey sticks - with a single strip of black tape around the blade - just like Orr! HE WAS THE MAN!!
This is all coming back to me because I saw a new Mastercard commercial that blew me away....



BOBBY ORR CHANGED THE GAME OF HOCKEY!!!
For those of you too young to have seen this cat on blades...watch this....



A few years later these posters came down. They were replaced by posters of HOT CHICKS. Like all prepubescent boys I eventually succumbed to the POWERS OF TESTOSTERONE....there's a GREAT song by the AWESOME Canadian band The Tragically Hip that pretty much sums up what happens to young men when they become aware of young women......the name of the song is FIREWORKS:

If there's a goal that everyone remembers,
it was back in ol' 72
we all squeezed the stick and we all pulled the trigger
and all I remember is sitting beside you

You said you didn't give a fuck about hockey
and I never saw someone say that before
you held my hand and we walked home the long way
you were loosening my grip on Bobby Orr






Well, my testosterone is, once again, beckoning me...this is Boston Bruins' Ice Girl - Whitney...



Jessica Burciaga is getting tired of the Red Sox playing like CRAP....

THE REVENGE OF ZIM....

Well, kids, the Rays just crushed the Red Sox 13-4....
Looks like Boston has 'em right where they want 'em!!!

Last night I had a bad dream.
It was about "THE REVENGE OF ZIM!"
Five years ago, during the 2003 American League Championship Series, Yankees' bench coach Don Zimmer charged Red Sox pitcher-extaordinaire Pedro Martinez....



You see, way-back-when, Don Zimmer was a pretty good infielder.
Zimmer played in the big leagues for 12 seasons despite being almost killed by two seperate beaning incidents! The first incident occurred in 1953 when Zimmer was hit in the temple by a pitch. He was in a coma for 13 days. An operation was performed wherein holes were drilled in his skull to relieve the pressure of swelling.
His vision was blurred, he could neither walk nor talk and his weight plunged from 170 to 124 lbs. Somehow Zim recuperated enough to continue his baseball career - only to be beaned again - in 1956 a fastball broke his cheekbone.
As a result of these beanings Zimmer has a surgically-implanted steel plate in his head!
Now, let's jump in our Time Machine and travel 47 years into the future - to Game 3 of the 2003 ALCS when Pedro hit Karim Garcia in the back with a fastball. Tempers begin to flare! Martinez then makes a threatening gesture...indicating that he is going to drill Jorge Pasada in the melon!!
The next inning Manny Ramirez takes exception to a high-and-tight Roger Clemens pitch and charges the mound. Both benches clear!! Then - all hell breaks loose when 72-year-old Don Zimmer charges Pedro Martinez...and Martinez throws him for a face-plant into the turf!!!



Zim also managed the Red Sox for three seasons (1977-79).
His tenure as manager is remembered by Boston fans mainly because of two infamous events:
1) Zim's 1978 Red Sox team lost a one-game playoff on the BUCKY "F***ING" DENT HOMERUN and 2) Zim had an ongoing feud with popular Red Sox pitcher Bill "Spaceman" Lee.
Lee had given Zim the nickname "The Gerbil!"

Guess what kids? Donny Zimmer is now the Senior Baseball Advisor for the....
TAMPA BAY RAYS!!!!!



This dude has been in baseball for seven decades!
His Tampa Bay uniform number is 60 to honour his 60 years in professional baseball!!
Zim met Babe Ruth when his American Legion team won a national championship in 1947!
He was signed by the Brooklyn Dodgers in 1949 and he was there with Jackie Robinson when they won the World Series in 1955! He was a member of Casey Stengel's Amazin' Mets in 1962 and he managed the Chicago Cubs to a division title in 1989!
He was in Yankee Stadium for Don Larsen's perfect game in 1956 and again for perfect games thrown by David Wells (1998) and David Cone (1999)!
....and, remember the Bucky Dent homer....Zim was ALSO sitting next to Joe Torre when AARON "F***ING" BOONE took Tim Wakefield over the wall in Yankee Stadium!!!

....."THE REVENGE OF ZIM"......BE AFRAID...BE VERY AFRAID.....

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MS. KEIBLER!!!

I hope all my Canadian buddies had a GREAT Thanksgiving....and all my American friends enjoyed a wonderful Columbus Day.
Guess what?...Today is Stacy Keibler's 29th Birthday!!
Let's take a long look at the Birthday Girl....



The Hot Baseball Wife Hall of Fame considers Ms. Keibler's booty and legs to be
AAA GRADE...TOP-NOTCH...HBWHOF INSPECTED...PRIMO HOT CHICK MATERIAL...




....DUDES, IT DOESN'T GET MUCH BETTER THAN THIS.....













HAPPY BIRTHDAY STACY...FROM THE HBWHOF!!!

A SAD DAY...

There are more important things in life than baseball games.
Earlier today a nineteen-year-old, first-round draft pick of the New York Rangers
died on the bench during a hockey game.
Russian forward Alexei Cherepanov was sitting on the bench when his heart stopped.
Efforts to revive Cherepanov both on the bench and, later, at the hospital were unsuccessful.

Well, folks, the Tampa Bay Rays administered a GOOD OL' FASHIONED ASS KICKING to the Boston Red Sox....with Boston's best pitcher, Jon Lester, on the hill...
The Rays beat Boston 9-1!!!
However, being a glass-half-full kinda guy I simply have to remind myself that in 2004 the Red Sox were behind the Yankees 3 games to none...and in 2007 Boston was behind the Indians 3 to 1 and in both instances they went on to win the World Series.
HAVE FAITH RED SOX NATION!!!!
HE-MAN DECLARES THAT THE RED SOX WILL WIN..."BY THE POWER OF GRAYSKULL!!"


TRUE TO MY WORD - JESSICA BURCIAGA WILL NOW APPEAR IN MORE CLOTHES BECAUSE JON LESTER DID NOT WIN TODAY....YOU GUYS BETTER START ROOTING FOR THE RED SOX....

A LONG, LONG NIGHT....

GAME TWO...TAMPA BAY BEATS BOSTON IN EXTRA INNINGS 9-8.
This game lasted 5 hours and 27 freakin' minutes!!
I went to bed at around 1:45 AM feeling quite DISGRUNTLED...
Tampa Bay has a very GOOD team...however, the October 2008 edition of the Red Sox is being hampered by the following problems:
1) It is quite obvious, particularly by observing his last two appearances, that Josh Beckett just doesn't have his usual "STUFF"...HE IS STRUGGLING.....
2) Mike Timlin just DOESN'T HAVE IT ANYMORE (...this has been apparent for a while..)
3) The LARGE FATHER needs to start poking the damn ball...does he miss Manny or something?

....PLEASE COME BACK, MY OLD FRIEND...

4) If Mr. Francona is utilizing Kevin Youklis at the hot corner (to replace a much-missed Mike Lowell...) HE NEEDS TO SIT MARK KOTSAY AND PUT SEAN CASEY AT FIRST BASE...THE DUDE HAS A RELIABLE BAT!
....PLUS - HE POSSESSES THE "NATURE BOY" RIC FLAIR WOOOOOOOO!! SMACKDOWN MAGIC...

....look - he's even got ol' Mike Timlin buying into the program...check-out the shirt.....(..mmmm..and check-out OUR LADY OF SUPREME HOTNESS getting tips on bowhunting in Fenway Park...)


Tomorrow is another day. The BEST PITCHER IN THE AMERICAN LEAGUE TAKES THE MOUND FOR MONDAY'S GAME.....


JESSICA BURCIAGA WILL ONLY REMOVE MORE CLOTHING IF JON LESTER BEATS THE RAYS ON MONDAY....

BOSTON WINS GAME ONE

GAME ONE...RED SOX SHUTOUT THE RAYS 2-0

(Sweet graphics courtesy of SoxNation)

The Asian contribution to the Game of Baseball cannot be underestimated...

THE RAYS & THE SEXIEST WOMAN ALIVE!!!

There are so MANY reasons I detest the Tampa Bay Rays.
For years it was ALWAYS the Yankees and the Red Sox vying for domination in the American League East...this year the Rays won the division...

...but I'm okay with that...change is a good thing...
The thing that bothers me is their fans. During the regular season, even when it was obvious they were a lock for the playoffs, the "fans" were few-and-far-between...the Tampa Bay attendance was PATHETIC!!!


But...NOW....you can be sure that the joint will be packed....

Then we have the actual team....
....Coco does the bob n' weave...and remains unscathed...

....before Coco could retaliate...the Rays fight the only way they know how...


....AND NOW THIS....


This t-shirt is currently available on the official MLB endorsed Rays Shop - online and at Tropicana Field. Geez, I KNOW the Rays have a GREAT team...but, heck, they may be jumping the gun just a tad....after all the Red Sox did win the freakin' World Series LAST YEAR...

I'm a little bitter...SORRY!
OK...Tampa Bay....tonight - THE DANCE BEGINS....BRING IT....


Let's wrap this up on a positive vibe...
Here's the latest pics of Hot Baseball Wife Hall of Fame inductee Halle Berry -
who was just picked by ESQUIRE as THE SEXIEST WOMAN ALIVE!!!!!


...this chick just had a baby six months ago.....









HALLE BERRY..42 YEARS OLD..JUST HAD A BABY..THIS CHICK KNOWS HOW TO BRING IT!!!

UNIBROWS & SAND WHISTLES...

This may be the MOST BIZARRE post EVER!!!
However, I feel compelled to write this...
I grew up in a small southern Ontario town on the shore of Lake Erie.
So, naturally, I spent a lot of time swimming in the lake and playing on the beach.
Anyone who has ever walked the sandy shores of any of the Great Lakes knows that you can find cool-looking rocks, fossils, shells, beach glass, dead fish and....
tampon applicators....in abundance...
We called them "SAND WHISTLES!"
Anyway, back-in-the-day, there was this kid who had NO FREAKIN' CLUE what these tiny devices were....and he used to stroll the beach nonchalantly chomping on a tampon applicator that he had recently discovered among the dunes!! NO LIE!!!
Well, it wasn't long before the kid developed a BIG, HANKIN' UNIBROW!!!!
I always suspected that the UNIBROW was the direct result of this dude chewing on discarded tampon applicators...
So, now, everytime I see somebody with a UNIBROW I immediately suspect them of being a CHILDHOOD-TAMPON-APPLICATOR-CHOMPER!!!!!!!!!

I recently saw this baseball card.....



DISTURBING IS IT NOT?
SO, I DID MORE RESEARCH....









...THAT, MY FRIENDS, IS ONE BAD-ASS UNIBROW!! HOW DID IT SPROUT?
...YOU MAKE THE CALL.....

YOU KNOW WHAT'S EVEN MORE TWISTED?
I did a search for tampon applicators....and this shit popped-up...WTF????



...TAMPON PAN FLUTE....




FOR OUR JEWISH FRIENDS....A TAMPON MENORAH...


WANT TO PUT A STAR ON TOP OF YOUR CHRISTMAS TREE?


NEED TO TAKE DOWN AN ENEMY SILENTLY?....TRY A TAMPON BLOWGUN....
(This is so freakin' good - I'm including the actual description!)
Inspired by marshmallow shooters, this air-powered tampon gun turns your feminine hygiene products into high-flying projectiles. Have a shootout between rival tampon brands, or use it as a fun alternative to paintball. The tampon shooter has a range of 10 to 20 feet depending on your ammo and lung capacity. The matching bandolier lets you carry a full "clip" (i.e.,box) of 20 tampons, so you'll never be caught short in the heat of battle.



DUDES....THAT IS SOME TWISTED SHIT!!!!!!

THIS IS SO DAMN MESSED-UP....I'LL THROW IN ONE HOT CHICK TO MAKE AMENDS...


....YOU CAN'T GO WRONG WITH MEGAN FOX....AND A BEER!!!!!

THE BAY OF KRUPA

Have you ever seen the flick "HIGHLANDER?"
This Scottish warrior, Connor MacLeod, discovers that he is an IMMORTAL...and there are ONLY a handful of his kind walking the earth. His fiercest enemy is known as THE KURGAN.
THE KURGAN is a butt-ugly, mean-spirited thug.
When IMMORTALS come in close proximity to one another they experience a phenomenon known as "THE QUICKENING," which compels IMMORTALS to battle each other!
The few IMMORTALS must participate in an ancient game, which can only end when the few surviving IMMORTALS compete in "THE GATHERING"....
IMMORTALS can only die from decapitation by another IMMORTAL...and after the head is severed all the victim's power is then transferred to his killer.
"THE GATHERING" is finished when one champion IMMORTAL is left standing....
..."IN THE END, THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE."......



This, my friends, is the CANUCK version of Connor MacLeod.....



...he's roaming left-field for the BOSTON RED SOX...



OH BABY.....RED SOX vs. RAYS....IT'S GONNA BE GOOD......

NOW, THE CANADIAN HIGHLANDER WOULD LIKE YOU TO ENJOY GRATUITOUS PICS OF HOT CHICKS!!!


"I'M JASON BAY AND I APPROVE THIS MESSAGE."



















...in case you NEED to know....that was JOANNA KRUPA!!!!

RED SOX, CUBS & CHRIS COOLEY

BOSTON RED SOX UP TWO GAMES...HEADED BACK TO FENWAY WITH JOSH BECKETT TAKING THE MOUND....NICE!!!
THE HOT BASEBALL WIFE HALL OF FAME SALUTES FELLOW CANUCK JASON BAY...FIRST TWO POST-SEASON GAMES - FIRST TWO POST-SEASON HOMERS.....EXTRA-NICE!!!

HOW WILL THE DODGERS - CUBS SERIES PLAY OUT?


Today's post is all about Washington Redskins' tight end Chris Cooley.
Crazy Chris...AKA Captain Chaos....is a HBWHOF fave...for so many reasons....
Let's begin with his latest good deed....

Recently Chris Cooley received an email about Kathy and Ron Frazier, Redskins' season ticket holders since 1991, who are unable to attend games this year because Ron has stage-4 colon cancer.
Within two hours of receiving the email the Redskins contacted the Frazier family to invite them to a team practice. Unfortunately Ron Frazier's cancer has advanced to the stage where he is unable to travel. So, after practice Cooley drove over to the Frazier's home to meet Ron and Kathy!
Two dozen family members, friends and neighbors showed-up when they got wind of the NFL player's visit.
"Cooley posed for dozens of pictures and autographed everything in sight: footballs; posters; pennants; photos; hats - and, of course, a whole bunch of No. 47 jerseys.
He stayed for nearly an hour, answering inside football questions, making small talk and discussing new coach Jim Zorn.
Cooley promised to send Ron a keepsake football if he scored a touchdown Sunday."

Ron Frazier looks on as Chris Cooley signs autographs.

(Courtesy of FrederickNewsPost)

It seems that Cooley also has a penchant for wearing short-shorts...so, obviously,
he is deeply in touch with his feminine side - or, perhaps, he's just channeling the 1970's.....



Now....if you are the least bit squeamish about seeing the male anatomy...STOP READING THIS BLOG NOW!!!!!

Not long ago, Cooley took a pic of his playbook and posted it on his blog.
Unfortunately, Chris also likes to blog NUDE. So, when he took the photo of his playbook he also captured his flaccid penis!
The sordid image was only online for a brief period before Cooley was alerted to his indiscretion and yanked the offending picture!
I know we have a few ladies who read the HBWHOF....SO - I'M GOING TO POST THE PIC OF COOLEY'S JUNK -
WARNING: DUDES LOOK AWAY AND CONTINUE SCROLLING DOWN OR PUT ON SOME WELDING GOGGLES, FOR GOD'S SAKE...I DON'T WANT TO BE RESPONSIBLE FOR BURNING SOMEONE'S RETINA...

.....I'M TRULY, TRULY SORRY FOR THAT......

To make up for what just happened I'm going to post a bunch of pics of Chris Cooley's wife!
Christy Cooley used to be a Washington Redskins' cheerleader!!
Her name was Christy Oglevee when she became a member of the Redskins' cheerleading squad at 18!!!
A few years back Cooley was dating another Redskins' cheerleader when this former girlfriend invited Christy Oglevee over to Cooley's house. He decided he NEEDED to get in Christy's pants AT FIRST SIGHT!
So, Chris and Christy began dating. The Redskins' organization has strict rules that there can be no fraternizing between their players and their cheerleaders...so poor Christy got fired!!
But...it was too late for Chris Cooley...he was a victim of SWEET POONTANG and he and Christy were married on May 23rd, 2008.

Here's Christy Cooley.....

THE RACK PACK......PART III

So, for those of you keeping score at home - thus far the HBWHOF's version of THE RAT PACK is as follows: FRANK SINATRA - SALMA HAYEK
DEAN MARTIN - DENISE MILANI
Our third replacement: SAMMY DAVIS, JR. - ANGEL MALAKU (AKA - LOLA LUV)

...I know what you're thinking...you're saying to yourself, "Hey, isn't this supposed to be "THE RACK PACK"....yes, my friends, it is....BUT THERE IS NO FREAKIN'
WAY THAT YOU CAN NEGLECT THIS CHICK'S BOOTY....IT'S NOT GONNA HAPPEN ON MY WATCH!!!

OK....FINE....WE'LL GET TO THE RACKAGE....





....SORRY DUDES....I"M HEADED BACK FOR MORE BOOTY.....








....BACK TO RACK....




....AND FINISH UP WITH THE TWO BEST BODYPAINT PHOTOS EVER!!!!!

SOXTOBER & THE "CALLED SHOT"

Well kids....the air outside is cool and crisp...the days are getting shorter...the leaves are beginning to change colour...that means it's time for playoff baseball...
yep, it's officially SOXTOBER!!!!


The Cubs are taking on the Dodgers at Wrigley Field RIGHT NOW...
Seventy-six years ago on this very day...October 1st, 1932...one of the most famous homeruns in baseball history also took place at Wrigley Field!
The New York Yankees were playing the Chicago Cubs for the World Series title.
The Yankees won the first two games in New York then traveled to Chicago for Game 3.
The game was tied 4-4 with one out in the fifth inning and Babe Ruth came to bat.
Ruth worked the count to 2-2 against Cubs pitcher Charley Root. The Cubs bench began heckling the Babe....the Bambino then pointed the barrel of his bat toward centerfield...and drilled the next pitch deep over the centerfield wall at Wrigley Field!!! Ruth's famous "Called Shot" put the Yankees ahead 5-4.
The Yankees went on to win the game 7-5 and completed the sweep with a 13-6 win in Game 4!